Insanity is…

I’m slowly inching away from blogging again. I just don’t know how other bloggers do it. How they stay interesting, fresh, new. Is there interest in the mundane, repetitive events of my day? I don’t know. I work. I eat the same things. I run a lot. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. It also feels like my “big revelations”, my mental issues I know I need to solve, keep circling in my head. I have some great idea how to get over it, I never put it into practice, and then a few months later I’m still bemoaning that last 5 pounds, another surgery, or that nagging running injury I can’t shake. 

I’m trying to only blog when I’ve got something important to say. But lately, I feel like what I think is important, I’ve already beat to death with words. I need to start taking everyone’s advice and actually using it instead of just thinking “great idea, would never work for me because XXX” and keep doing what I’m doing. I’m not unhappy, I’m actually pretty darn happy and optimistic these days, but if I keep letting the same themes run my life, I’m just never going to grow. And maybe it’s time. A friend asked me last night if I was taking any steps towards my goal of being a corporate wellness director. I had to admit that I took the one rejection pretty hard and just stopped. One person tells me no and I take it as gospel. Not to get too philosophical or cliched, but I’m sure every great person got told no probably more than once and kept going. So if I want to be greater, I need to do greater. 

More to come, but I’m about to take off for a much needed massage! Getting a sports massage to try and rid myself of this shin pain, and if that doesn’t work I guess it’s xray time. Oh, body, didn’t you get the memo that I was going to beat on you and run you into the ground, but you were just supposed to take it and stay healthy? What do you mean, 30 miles a week for 6 months takes a toll? Lame. But maybe time to evaluate a few items on my fitness routine. 

Am I cranky or are they tacky?

Everyone has undoubtedly heard about the suicide of Robin Williams by now. It’s sad, it’s all over every news page and feed, and it’s a reminder to hold onto those you love. But I’m feeling a bit apprehensive about the number of bloggers I see in my facebook feed trying to use this tragedy to start a discussion and stir up traffic. I just don’t feel like that’s in good form. Maybe it’s just me and maybe I’m cranky, but “Oh, no, Robin Williams died! New blog link in the comments-what’s your favorite movie of his?” just seems tacky and tasteless. 

In more “Laura is basically a grumpy old grandma these days” news, it seems like I’m falling apart these days! Tomorrow we have an appointment to check how severe the return of my endometriosis is, and hopefully from there we can formulate a game plan or schedule the next surgery. My left leg has been bugging me for about 3 weeks, and I can’t decide if I should start by getting a massage and see if that helps or if I should go straight to the dr at this point. I did get a pedicure while this has been going on, and they do give a bit of a massage there and it didn’t help. Any runners feel free to chime in on this-my lower left leg, both front and back (or maybe that means in the bone?) just feels a stabby pain and like it’s heavier than the other when I start running. The pain fades a bit while running, but if I stop and start then I go through the cycle of “OUCH! OUCH ouch ow OK I’m cool now” all over again. Then after the workout, my leg will be sore and the pain radiates down to my heel. If I get up in the middle of the night to pee or get a drink, my heel really hurts for the first few steps. My online research is pretty sure it’s fatal, so any contradictory theories are appreciated. 

I’m also just very exhausted lately. Took a brief nap after work yesterday, which means I’ve just fallen asleep in the middle of the day for 4 days in a row, and my eyes are all red and bloodshot like I’ve been on a bender (I promise I haven’t). Today’s my 3 hour gym day, and I’m hoping I make it through without curling up on a weight bench for 5 minutes! 

So, basically, today’s blog post=Laura’s a big whiner. Tell me something good and cheer me up here, friends! And as always, lets end on a funny note! 

giggles

Guys? Guys, why are you laughing? I don’t get it.